Before Ryan and I could get married at my church, we had to take some marriage classes and read a book together. The book we had to read was called The Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman. If you're not familiar with the book, it talks about the five different ways that you can express your love to your significant other. There's also a version of this book on the love languages of your kids.
The five love languages are words of affirmation, acts of service, physical touch, quality time, and receiving gifts which we can use to express our love to our spouse and to our kids. We can also use these to express love to ourselves.
We all have a love language that we prefer most often, but we also will have times that we prefer the other love languages depending on what we have going on in our lives at that time. An example might be a mom with little ones. Her love language might have been physical touch before kids, but now that she has littles she might be feeling over touched and not want physical touch for awhile. She might be wanting words of affirmation or acts of service instead. I think our love languages can change depending on current situations and seasons of life.
My personal love language is acts of service, but there are times in my life where I might prefer words of affirmation or receiving gifts. So since we all need all 5 love languages at different times in our lives, wouldnt it make sense to can take these and create a self care routine where all of our needs are being met by all five love languages. So let's create your Self Care Self Love Routine with the Five Love Languages
Love Language 1 - Words of Affirmation
If this is your love language, you feel the best when someone is expressing their affection for you in words. They encourage you and appreciate you. They speak kindly and lovingly towards you.
Step 1 - Add Words of Affirmations to your Self Care Self Love Routine.
Listen to that inner voice. What are you saying to yourself each day? Stop that negative self talk and replace it with positive words of affirmation.
Ways to Include Words of Affirmations in your Routine:
- write in a gratitude journal each morning
- say daily affirmations to yourself
- listen to a motivating podcast on self development
- write affirmations on post it notes and place on your water bottle to encourage you throughout the day
- create a vision board with inspiring quotes
- drink from a coffee mug that has an affirmation written on it
- write affirmations on post it notes and place on your mirror where you'll see them everyday
Love Language 2 - Physical Touch
If this is your love language, you feel the best when someone is expressing their affection for you non-verbally through body language and touch. Receiving and showing affection through physical touch makes you happiest.
Step 2 - Add Physical Touch to your Self Care Self Love Routine.
What relaxes you? This one might look a little different for everyone. Find a way to be more in tune with your body whether it's a workout or a bubble bath.
Ways to Include Physical Touch in your Routine:
- take a bubble bath and light a candle
- do some yoga in the morning
- take an evening walk around your neighborhood
- go for a bike ride
- have a nightly skincare routine
- do a weekly facial mask
- diffuse essential oils
Love Language 3 - Receiving Gifts
If this is your love language, you feel the best when someone is giving you a thoughtful gift and making you a priority. You're happiest when someone thinks of you and makes or buys something for you while keeping your interests in mind.
Step 3 - Add Receiving Gifts to your Self Care Self Love Routine.
This is all about finding some way to treat yourself. And you don’t have to just buy yourself a gift. You could find a new hobby or bring out an old hobby you haven’t had time for lately.
Ways to Include Receiving Gifts in your Routine:
- start a hobby doing something you love
- treat yourself at a local boutique
- buy yourself a bouquet of flowers
- treat yourself to an energizing snack
- get a drink at a local coffee shop
- redecorate a space in your home
- take a self development course
Love Language 4 - Quality Time
If this is your love language, you feel the best when someone is giving you uninterrupted and focused conversation. You are happiest when you are getting one on one time with someone.
Step 4 - Add Quality Time to your Self Care Self Love Routine.
Spend some quality time alone and give yourself that undivided present and in the moment attention.
Ways to Include Quality Time in your Routine:
- do morning yoga
- wake early and sit in silence
- go for a quiet drive
- sit outside and watch the sunset
- listen to your favorite playlist
Love Language 5 - Acts of Service
If this is your love language, you feel the best when someone is going out of their way to help you out and alleviate your workload.
Step 5 - Add Acts of Service to your Self Care Self Love Routine.
Show yourself some love and look for ways to make your days a little easier and lessen your workload with these acts of service.
Ways to Include Acts of Service in your Routine:
- meal planning
- pick out your outfit the night before
- create monthly goals
- use a habit tracker
- declutter a space in your home or office